From: mew3point14@doramail.com (Daniel Snyder) "Once upon a time, there was a beautiful bride. She knew love, and she knew what it was to be loved. But she was proud, too, and resolved not to give herself to anyone. "On day of her wedding, she was dressed in her most beautiful gown and surrounded by everyone she loved. But she frowned, because she was proud and she had only half-chosen her husband-to-be. Although she knew him by the word of others, she had never seen his face. "'Smile and love your husband,' they all shouted, 'smile and love your husband.' And the longer she did not smile, the louder they shouted, and the more impatient everyone became. "Finally, she swallowed her pride and smiled weakly. In that moment, her bridegroom came to her. She saw him for the first time. "He was beautiful to look upon, and charming in his bearing. Willingly, she smiled then. Willingly, she married him. "What was the name of the bride?" -- "Always, always control the sword," Shinji instructed. "A beginning student will change his or her form to suit the desires of the sword-- its heft, or the shape of the handle. This is a mistake. If you let the sword control the swing, the sword will also control the damage. Unlike a person, a sword can never grow; it can only be whittled away. "An enlightened swordsman can execute the same strike with any sword in the world." In unison, the three on the rooftop of Akumafune stood and began their practice. Ikari Shinji faced his students: Ayanami Rei was on his left, Nagisa Kaworu was on his right. Although they exchanged a few spoken words, corrections and affirmations, they were utterly silent on the inside. Each one was focused on their practice. Sun and sword and muscle were their world. >From the top of Akumafune Dormitory, they could only see as far west as Kazarashi; it rose two stories over their heads. It was also a long dormitory, stretching further back towards the north than their building. Behind it, they could see some of the acres of woodland; in front, they could see out over the open parkland and its parallel rows of trees. Wrapping around from the east, a stand of enormous pine trees obfuscated the upper part of Feuervogel Academy's wall. It would drive one insane to think what lay there: how the sky, seemingly as real as it had ever been, transformed into the null and void of the embryonic creation. Ikari Shinji did not think deeply about it. He let it be. After a half an hour of kendo practice, Shinji set down his bokken and drew out his foil. "I'm not sure I'm going to have the time to teach you everything you need to know about fencing," he admitted. "You know, friend Shinji," said Kaworu. "The thing is, it's so tied to European culture," the blue-eyed boy went on. "Fencing is in a lot of ways related to chivalry, like kendo is related to bushido here in Japan, but at the same time there are critical differences. Look here." He drew himself up high off the ground, with his feet at right angles to one another and spread greater than shoulder-width apart; his right hand held the foil, his left was positioned out of harm's way. "This is the en garde stance. It allows a great range of movement, and with practice you can put a lot of force into your swing. As you can tell, though, it's not a very natural position. You can't imagine the chi flowing up through the fencer's body to be concentrated in a strike. Fencing doesn't have much to do with controlling spiritual willpower. "On the other hand, it was considered a noble and a martial pursuit throughout Europe. It was understood that a gentleman would not only fence, but might even use it in combat. If two generals were to fight a duel rather than risk soldiers in an assault, it would be considered as exceptional--and honorable--as here in Japan. "I'm telling you this because...to really appreciate fencing, you have to put yourself in this kind of frame of mind. Allow me to demonstrate." Shinji stood and enacted a kind of kata, advancing, retreating and dueling against imaginary enemies. He lunged, feinted, parried and thrusted. Rei and Kaworu watched his every move, smiling as the studied. They applauded when Shinji was done. "That was very flat," Rei concluded. Kaworu nodded in agreement. "In your kendo, Shinji, there was much more made of the transaxial plane. In your fencing, you seem much more restricted to the sagittal." "Yes," Shinji said. "If you think about it, almost all kendo strikes can be done with either one or two swords, in either the left or the right hand. Fencing technique was designed for a single sword in the right hand. It restricts the range of movements in favor of one sort of person." "Does that mean," Kaworu asked, "that all else being equal, a kendo master will always defeat a fencing master?" "Not at all," replied Shinji. "A fencing saber is much faster and more precise than is a katana. All else being equal, both of them would be dead on the first pass." Rei sighed heavily. "What a waste of human life," she said. -- "Hesed," Nagisa Kaworu said reverently as he set down an empty soup bowl. There was a slight husk, very difficult for the native Japanese speaker to achieve, on the first syllable. Chesed. "It means love, friend Shinji. Tell me what you know about the love of God." Ikari Shinji thought carefully before he spoke. "Hesed contains Gevurah, doesn't it? Therefore, Love contains aspects of Rigor and Power. From studying Gevurah, I know that everything I do is a prayer. Love...if everything I do is a prayer, then I have nothing to fear from God, do I? All it takes is virtuous behavior, dedication...devotion. If I love God, and I devote my life to loving God, I draw closer." Kaworu nodded. He held up a hand to Shinji and whispered something into Ayanami Rei's ear. She gathered up the dirty dishes. Kaworu said to Shinji, "I think it best if we were to withdraw to the kitchen. It would be illustrative." Akumafune Dormitory had an industrial kitchen, with a large gas stove and a walk-in refrigerator. Stainless steel cupboards and shelves filled the spaces around the kitchen's walls. From out of a cupboard, Rei drew out a jar of olives. They were large black olives, each one almost as big as Shinji's thumb, floating in briney water. She handed the jar to Kaworu, who handed it to Shinji. The boy squeezed and turned the lid to no avail. He tried, again and again, to twist the lid free. At length, Kaworu took pity on the boy. "Let me try," he said, and spent the next couple of minutes struggling against the unwieldy jar. By the time that Rei had washed the dishes, dried them and put them away all by herself, both Shinji and Kaworu were flushed and gasping for breath. Taking custody of the jar, the girl held it under warm tap water for a few seconds, then opened it with minimal effort. "Thank you, Rei," Kaworu and Shinji said in unison. "You are welcome," she replied. She reached into the jar and extracted two olives, one for each boy, then took one for herself. Shinji grimaced as he ate his. Spitting the seed into the sink, he commented, "I've heard olives are an acquired taste...I believe it now." "It is an unusual taste," Rei agreed. Kaworu said nothing for a few moments as he rolled the seed around in his mouth, trying to raze every little bit of the fruit's flesh. At length, he took the seed out of his mouth with his fingers and placed it in the sink. Then he told a parable. "Do you know about olives, friend Shinji? They grow on trees in orchards. They are grown for their oil. The oil can flow freely out of the olive, given the right circumstances; but more often than not, it requires pressure. We have thus invented the olive press for this need. They turn and turn the handle, and the press drives down and down, until the physical shape of the olive is lost and the oil is pure. "People invest--time, effort and money--they invest in the olive oil for many reasons. Some people like to use it for cooking because it makes their food taste better and cook faster. Some people use it as...ah...a lubricant. Some people, of course, stock the olive oil and sell it to others as a way to make their livelihoods. "I put it into my lamp. I have a lamp, Shinji. There is a little nook I can see from the outside, a kind of focus point for the oil to go into. A few drops of oil in the focus will produce a bright pure flame that would shine even without being lit. I can slip a little hood of glass around the lamp, and even though it is a material thing and will temper the visible power of the flame, the glass ensures that the flame will not be extinguished by a sudden gust of wind. "And what do I do with my lamp, Shinji? I ward off the darkness in the world around me. It may be full of beastly things. But as long as I have a single drop of olive oil, Shinji, I have nothing to fear. I can study. I can write, I can...even stay awake for my prayers." Kaworu smiled a little bit at his joke and said, "Now, let us conclude the parable of the Verse of Light. A riddle for you, Ikari Shinji. We have talked of the light that comes through the glass from the nook in the lamp that holds the oil of the olive from the tree. Prophecy, Shinji. Whose hands plant the olive tree?" Shinji said, "The hands of love itself." Kaworu laughed. "Indeed, Shinji, verily, verily! It is so. Meditation upon that which is neither of the East nor West. This meditation produces the fruit of Understanding--Love. Love lies between Understanding and Judgement. "Raw belief is of little use without discipline and dogma to bring out the Spirit of God itself. Our capacity to find joy in all things as they are is placed in the framework of our senses, taking up only a small volume. Our senses, what we experience in this world, help us focus on the ever-burning Spirit of God to bring forth God's Will. The Will comes streaming through our imagination and creativity. We hold up our intelligence and creativity as a conduit for the Will of God to overcome the terrors of God as Judgement. This is the parable of the Verse of Light, as preached by Ghazālī, a wise man." Shinji asked, "And if the action of love is all that is needed to continue this...how did it begin?" "That," Kaworu said with his angelic smile, "is a mystery for another day. For now, remember this--that you must love God in the extreme. You must accept what _is_ with a smile, a laugh if it is joyous and a consoling word if it is sad. When you keep holy days because of their intrinsic holiness and you give thanks for the life you take into you with every meal--ah, thank you, Rei," Kaworu said as he accepted his lunch box, "you will know rigor within love and without fear." The three children were ready for school: Shinji with his backpack and Rei with her attache. Together, silent for want of something to say, they walked out of the kitchen and through the darkened hallways to the front door. Shinji opened the door just in time to avoid getting cuffed on the shoulder. Standing on the front doorstep was Ibuki Maya. She was dressed in the regulation white and turquoise seifuku. Her socks were fashionably scrunched down almost to her ankles. There was a blue barrette with yellow flowers in her hair, holding her bangs out of her eyes. In her left hand she held a soft-sided computer carrier. Optical disks and glitter pens jutted from out of a pocket. Her other hand still hovered in dead space, ready to knock on the opened door. "Good morning," she said, "did you get a good night's sleep?" Shinji nodded the affirmative. Rei and Kaworu bowed in unison and said, "Good morning." The swordsman asked, "What brings you over here so early in the morning, Maya?" She had the answer prepared; it was not the first time that morning that she had to give the explanation. "As the sole candidate for the position of housing secretary, I've obtained special permission to survey the campus this morning. I wanted to make sure that last night's curfew went as planned." In a more personal tone, Maya went on. "Seems like nothing's happened, apart from a couple of calls for residence assistants. Akumafune's the last place on my list, and the campus has been quiet. How are the three of you?" "We are all very well, thank you, Ibuki-san," Rei said graciously. "We had a quiet night. And we have had a quiet morning." "We were on our way to the greenhouse," Shinji explained. "Maya, won't you come with us?" "I'd hate to be a burden..." "You will not be a burden," Rei replied. "There is more than enough room in the greenhouse for four people." "Believe it or not, I've never been inside the greenhouse. I'd love to come with you." The four walked off to the west. Maya, walking beside Shinji, talked in an earnest voice. "Just between you and me, Shinji- kun...I don't want to spoil anyone's surprise, but I think Kanae-chan's planning something for today." "Eh? What kind of something?" "That's what I don't know. But," she went on, "I've seen her making notes in a little book ever since she told me you were going to run for office. And, on top of that, I know she's been talking with Aida-kun and Aoba-kun about something." "Why is that important?" Shinji asked. "Well," Maya explained, "most of the time, if she wants to plan a party she'll talk to Juri-sempai also. But, Juri-sempai is so levelheaded, she'd try to talk Kanae-chan out of anything even a little bit wild. So I think that she's got something up her sleeve." "I see," Shinji said nodding. "But then, why didn't she also talk to Shiori-san, since Shiori-san's going to be the Social VP?" Maya stopped dead in her tracks. "Oh, dear," she said, tightening her grip on her computer bag. "I hadn't thought of that at all. I guess I'm wrong." "What? No you're not." Shinji reached out and took Maya's hand in his without a second thought. "Maya, it was just a thought. Don't get worked up over it. Maybe you just didn't see her calling Shiori-san. You don't know either way." "I guess that could be the case..." "Not having any evidence goes both ways, you know. It's neither pro nor con." Maya heaved a terrific sigh. "I'm really no good at this whole psychological guessing-game thing. Misato-sempai was really smart about it. She'd have the whole thing figured out by this point. She'd probably even know why..." "Why what?" "Why Kanae-chan was talking to the Magi." Shinji and Maya began to walk faster. The greenhouse was in sight, and their companions were already opening the door. "I mean, nobody talks with the Magi, not even the teachers. It's just not _done_..." The matter was put aside as they entered the greenhouse, the world of shattered sunlight. Ibuki Maya was overwhelmed by the roses' beauty; and almost immediately, she began to pepper Ayanami Rei with questions, questions about light and nutrients, bulbs and diseases. Rei answered each and every one carefully, ever-mindful of the task she was working on at any one instant. Refusing Maya's offers of help, she went to her work joyously and earnestly. Maya was left to wander the greenhouse paths and meditate on purity. Ikari Shinji approached her. "You said that you had seen Kanae-san talking to the Magi," he said. "Do you know what the Magi are?" "They're an element of the natural world here at Feuervogel," she replied. "I don't understand. What's that supposed to mean?" "It means exactly what it sounds like it means, Shinji-kun," Maya said, reluctantly taking her eyes from the roses, hesitant even to blink. "They are an element of our own environment, our own world. They're predictable but not predictable; like the weather, say, or knowing when a battery is going to die. The three Magi--Melichor, Balthazar and Caspar--obey their own sort of laws and causality. About the only thing I know for sure about them is that there's only one group of them. That is, there's only the three. And I'm pretty sure that they only go as three. You'd never see one Magus going off alone if the other two came down with a virus, or something." "Interesting," Shinji said quietly. He was astonished to discover that a smile had crept onto his face and a blush into Maya's cheeks during the conversation. He drew the blush a little further. "Tell me, how long have you been at Feuervogel, Maya-chan?" "I'm into my third year here." "And the Magi have been like this the whole time? Since you were in ninth grade?" Maya lit up in a very, very bright red. From across the garden of roses, Nagisa Kaworu glanced bemusedly at Maya for an instant before walking over to join Rei. Relaxing a little, but still blushing, Maya confessed to the tiles at her feet, "I was never in ninth grade. I had to repeat my tenth grade year last year." "Oh." It was Shinji's turn to be surprised. "Maya, I didn't mean to pry. We can talk about something else if you'd like." "No--no--no, I don't mind. Honestly," she said. Then she regained her smile. "It's actually kind of silly strange. I was held back because...I failed Physical Education." "Is that so?" Shinji smiled. "Uh-huh." Maya's blushing had faded from radiant crimson to violet highlights now. In symmetry with Shinji's earlier gesture, she took his hand. His thumb brushed her index finger. "I've always had a time with PE. The teachers are always trying to get me to run faster or jump higher or go further. Do you know what I'm talking about? Shinji-kun, I know what I'm capable of, no more. I don't want some stupid teacher trying to force me to believe I can break through my own limits! I'm almost 17, I want to be treated like an adult. So the year I came here, it got so bad that I threw away my gym uniform and stopped going to class at all." "And that didn't help." "No." "What happened?" "I struck a bargain with the teachers." Maya absently ran a thumb on Shinji's knuckles. He smiled for many reasons. "I made a deal where if I trained in fencing for an hour a day, five days a week, I wouldn't have to take regular PE. I asked Juri-sempai if that was OK with her. She said to me, 'Two hours'. And I found out, by 'two hours' she meant two hours of practice. I was on my own for stretching out, running laps and pressing weights. She also meant two hours of getting sliced up by every member of the team if I couldn't defend myself. But you know what?" She smiled and opened bright brown eyes wide for him. "I said I wouldn't go back, and I never have. And I don't regret it one bit." _All's right with the world,_ he thought. Unbidden, he spoke. "I've never quite flunked anything, Maya-chan. I've come close a lot. I have my swords, and my cello, and my SDAT, and...sometimes, I feel like I don't have the incentive to learn anything more." "I didn't know you had an SDAT player." "Yeah, of course I do. I listen to it all the time." Shinji made an idle gesture. "I just pop in a tape, press play and let the world slide away from me. It's easy." Maya shook her head. "I haven't seen you with a tape player since I met you, Shinji-kun. You must be mistaken or something." "But I do listen to it...a lot...at least, I thought I did." The young man paused to sift through his memories of Feuervogel. Although he could remember listening to his Walkman at different times, these were few and far between. "I guess I haven't used it all that much," he admitted. "I've had Rei around to talk to, and Kaworu. And you and Touji, and everyone. And my kendo...and my cello. I guess I have been pretty busy." The two spent a few minutes watching Rei make final her morning's work on the roses. Maya broke the silence. She turned to Shinji and said, "You really like being at Feuervogel, don't you, Shinji-kun?" "I'd never thought about it," he replied. "Of course you do! I mean, come on." They followed Rei and Kaworu out of the greenhouse as Maya counted her observations. "You've happily lived off in one corner of campus for months. You've tried to make friends, and succeeded. You haven't begrudged anyone who's challenged you to a Duel. You've managed to pull up your grade point average, it seems like. I heard you got to talk to the Board of Directors, which is a pretty big honor, 'cause Kanae-chan told me so. And last of all, you're running to be president of the Student Council. You must be in love with something about this crazy school, Shinji-kun. What is it? Tell me." Ikari Shinji considered the question. Butterfly thoughts fluttered in his mind. What made him do what he did? What aspect of his life had led him to forsake instant gratification and embrace a world where he was not loved unconditionally? "I don't know any other way to live than the way I do now," he said. "I love the changes that have gone on inside of me, and I want to share them with everyone. It's not the school alone that I love...maybe if I were able to make the whole school realize how close we all are to happiness, everyone would get along with each other and live happily together. That sounds naive, doesn't it? Almost kind of sappy. But it's happened to me. Why can't it happen to everyone? Why can't we all experience what I'm going through? That's why I like it here, Maya-chan. Feuervogel, for all the pain and suffering, has made a new person out of me. And I see a whole campus of people who could share this joy with me. I love them for what they are. Do you understand?" She nodded. She blushed again. She shuffled her feet. Before the moment became too uncomfortable, Kaworu cleared his throat. "Shinji, friend Rei and I are going to class. It's time." "Ah. Thanks." To Maya, Shinji said, "Why don't I play my cello for you? Two days after tomorrow, maybe? Would you like that, Maya?" "Thank you! Yes, I would be deeply honored to hear you perform!" Maya gushed, bowing low to hide her face. She added hurriedly, "I need to get over to the other building because I have calculus first thing and I had to beg my way into class and the teacher is really, really mean, but I'll see you in a couple of days, or today, or whenever, Shinji-kun! Bye-bye!" And she was gone, without even grace to her departure. In her wake, letting the rush of emotions crash over him, Shinji waved. "Goodbye, Maya-chan! Have a good day in class!" He joined his two friends and they went off to homeroom. -- They were in the midst of a badminton game when the fire alarm went off. Shinji and Kensuke had been playing singles at the far end of the gymnasium. While the girls were outside on the field hockey green under the threatening sky, the boys spread out at nets strung up across the inlaid wood floor. Singles and doubles fought back and forth for control of the buzzing birdie. Then the brutal siren's grind tore through the rafters of the gym, cutting the parabolic arc of white plastic feathers. The red rubber head of the shuttlecock was transformed from something amusing to something ironic. The boys felt a pang of fear, the unknown. What was going on? Had disaster compounded disaster? Not saying a word, they placed their rackets solemnly on the floor and left the gymnasium for the crowded daylight. As they filed out of the gym, the young men could neither smell nor see telltale wisps of smoke. Boys and girls unified in apprehension. Then came another siren, the blare of a personal bullhorn. The gym class hearkened, filing to the center of campus. Unbeknownst to all, a wooden stage had been created in the open area near the greenhouse and the column. Aoba Shigeru broke away from the gym class and joined Ohtori Kanae, Takatsuki Shiori, Kaworu Miki and the three Magi on stage. "Good morning, everyone," Kanae said through her bullhorn as the school assembled. "I'm sorry to upset everyone like this, but there's been a change of plans." The student body, hundreds strong, exchanged confused glances. "There is no fire. Also, there are no more classes for today. Instead, we're going to have a little recreation. I'll turn things over to Shiori-san to explain." "We'll be having lunch out on the parkland shortly," the younger girl announced. "After that, we'll be having a scavenger hunt. Everyone can participate, but to make sure everyone gets to know some new faces, you must have at least five people on your team who are in different grades." A ripple of murmurs washed through the assembly. Shiori waited patiently until the noise had died down before she concluded. "And as an incentive, we have prizes for all teams who enter." "Bananas!" "Spices from India!" "Shaved ice with syrup!" "Cow's milk!" "Fashionable jewelry!" "Exotic eggs!" "No, no, we can't use them. They hatched." "All of them? Tarnation." "And the first team to bring back every item on the list will receive...a car!" A collective gasp rent the air. The automobile in question was truly a work of art. It was a sports car of European design with gently curved edges and thick fierce chromium steel. Four could sit comfortably in the genuine leather upholstery. The grand hood, wide like a grown woman's hips, hinted at phenomenal driving power. It was a tiger nursed on blood, ready for a meal of blacktop. "Um...how are underage people supposed to drive around when there's no roads anymore?" "Doesn't matter. There's no gas stations anymore either." "All right, boys and girls, you've caught enough of an eyeful. Young lady, if you'd care to resume?" Kanae spoke into the bullhorn again. "Everyone, lunch will be served promptly on the parkland. We'll be beginning the hunt after lunch." For the first time in days, the students smiled and cheered. It was a free day! A day to set aside their cares and concerns, to make their own choices instead. A day to find something new in what only an hour before had been stale and tired. The crowd turned inwards on itself and shambled out to the parkland, where tables and bento boxes were waiting. One hundred conversations about freedom and everything it entailed flew skyward from out of the exuberant mass. Shinji pushed his way through the student exodus to the platform, where the organizers were surveying their handiwork. The boy bowed respectfully to Kanae and then shook her hand. "Maya mentioned to me this morning," he explained, "that you might have something planned for today. Wherever did you get the idea for a scavenger hunt?" "We've had them before," Kanae replied, "as a class fundraiser. But this is the first time in a long time anyone's made an all-school hunt." Shigeru jumped in. "When you look at it, it's pretty obvious we needed to cool everyone down, isn't it? And the campus lockdown kind of meant that, you know, we had to swing back the other way. Have a little anarchy, a little raucous fun." Shinji nodded. "So, a scavenger hunt..." He trailed off, watching Kensuke's departure. Touji, pushed by Juri, was arriving on the scene; and the bespectacled youth was clearly eager to be with his friend. "Kanae-san had asked me about it back a few days ago," said Shiori. "All I had to do was arrange for the prizes and type out a list of things around the campus." She passed a list to Shinji. He idly glanced down the list's contents. Flowers, balloons, baseball paraphernalia, a feather, a chair cushion. An eclectic lot, all told. Shinji asked, "So how long do the teams have?" "All afternoon, if it takes that long." "I can't help wondering..." He fell silent at Arisugawa Juri's approach. Having left Touji in the company of Kensuke, the fencer was free to be direct and curt. "Is this acceptable behavior?" she asked Shinji, clearly in demand of an answer. "Why are you asking me?" he inquired. "I didn't organize this thing." "That isn't how the rules work, Shinji," Juri came back. "I see here no fewer than five people that you, head of the party, are responsible for. You're the man who'll be called to task if something's amiss." Shinji could feel his blood pressure rising behind his eyes, deep within his skull. "Juri-san, explain to me _exactly_ what you're thinking about before we go any further." "Very well," she sighed. Without being asked, Miki reached for a scavenger hunt list and began to make notes on the back side. "First, pulling a fire alarm. Which of you pulled it, and did you have permission?" "I did," Kanae answered. "Mother said that it was all right. It was the best way to get people's attention all around the school, she said." When Miki was ready, Juri went on. "Maybe, maybe not, but Kanae's mother is certainly not accountable to Shinji, or any other of us. What about the mechanics of the hunt, the prizes? Have all of those been cleared?" Miki spoke up. "Pursuant to Chapter 6 of the Student Council handbook, all paperwork was filed two days ago and approved this morning. We have permission to remove and return specific objects of the school's property, and individual students are explicitly responsible for returning them." "And the prizes?" Miki and Shiori glanced at Suzuhara Touji, in his wheelchair just offstage. "Yeah, I got receipts for everything. They're all private donations by faculty and staff members." "All right." Juri tapped her foot in thought. "It seems to me like we're forgetting something, but it's slipped my mind what it could be." "Juri-san?" Ikari Shinji was smiling. "We all appreciate your looking out for the interests of the party and the school as a whole. Thanks for your concern and your troubles." "Well, you're welcome." _Funny,_ she thought, _I can't ever remember telling someone 'you're welcome' before today._ She went on, "I'm not trying to sound like the bad guy. Maybe I'm just a little bit suspicious, since everything is going so well. No offense, Kanae. I'm naturally suspicious of a surprise party." "Would you like to help plan the next one?" offered Shiori. The older girl smiled. "Thank you. I would." "Should I still be taking notes?" asked Miki, and they all laughed. Shinji said, "If all of you want to get something to eat, I can stay here. It'd be my responsibility to...er...take responsibility in any case. Kanae-san and everyone can get some food, then when you get done you can come back here and get the scavenger hunt underway." "Hey." It was Touji. He was half-risen from the wheelchair, his left hand tightly clutching his cane. "If y'all are goin' down to the south of campus, ya get me an' Shinji somethin' to munch on?" So it was that the two friends were left behind with each other for company. A distance separated them from the other stragglers; they were still on stage, they could be seen. They spoke quietly. "Are you doing well, Touji?" Shinji asked. "Yeah, I guess so. I dunno." Touji seated himself on the edge of the stage and continued to speak. "When I don't think about what's been goin' on, how Asuka and the Prof died--I mean, even more than Ritsuko and Mari-chan, I mean, they were so close by! It hurts sometimes, man. But I can talk to people. Just about anyone. And they listen, too, and they're polite enough to try 'n' understand." "Who do you talk to?" "One of Asuka's friends, Keiko. She's more shook up than she really admits to, but she listens. I think it's like she wants to help me to help herself. If I say it helps me to talk, then it helps her to listen." "I have Rei. Even though we're not, ah, intimate with each other anymore, she still listens. And she even talks about what's on her own mind." "What does she talk to you 'bout?" "Food, the roses, schoolwork...kendo, now that I've started to teach her and Kaworu." "You're teachin' them how to use swords? Shit, now I've heard it all. I never would've guessed." Two young men talked openly and comfortably in the midday. They looked out upon their classmates' euphoria with detachment. _We are glad for you,_ they thought, _but our hearts must be heavy for yours to be light. Bless you, and come to us what may._ These were enchanted times, when the clouds took the forms of dreams long forgotten and the wind bore the sounds of fairies crying. "Touji..." "Yeah?" "I don't quite know how to begin," Shinji explained as he sat down next to his friend. "The vice president doesn't have a lot of responsibilities, does he?" "No, I guess not." "Does that bother you?" "No." Shinji took a deep breath and continued. "Basically, your main job is to take over for me if I can't do my job, right?" "When you put it like that," Touji chuckled, "it sounds like a downer job, doesn't it? I suppose you're right." "Touji-kun. The truth is that, if there was one person I wanted to take over for me here, that would be you. I'm serious. You're a better, more charismatic guy than I'll ever be. "I'm worried about what the future will bring. I know that everything will be all right, but I'm not wise enough to understand the particulars." He looked at his friend. "Touji, promise me that if something should happen to me, you'd take over." "Happen? Like what?" "Like, my dad shows up on campus again. Or I get thrown out of school." "Shinji, nothin' like that's ever gonna happen." "Promise me," the boy said earnestly. "OK, OK, I promise." "You mean it?" "Yeah." Shinji smiled. "I never doubted you, Touji-kun. I simply needed to hear you say it." "Well, I dunno," he replied. "There's a big difference between thinking something and saying something, isn't there?" "There is," Shinji said. "It's just that we can do things without thinking, without fully understanding our own actions. We all know this, and it threatens how we feel about sincere actions. Faith bridges the gap, faith in the goodness of other people. I believe in you and the strength of your actions, Touji. When you say, 'I will follow you,' I know you're speaking the truth." "Wow," Touji laughed. "I got a tough act to follow up on." "You are my most fundamental friend, Touji. Even if you forget my name and my face, I know you'll do what's best, again and again." The two boys gazed off into the hazy yon, the southern parkland that rolled and roiled with their classmates. Some ate and some lounged; others were already partnering in teams of the scavenger hunt to follow. Shinji's thoughts were interrupted by three discreet, asynchronous coughs. He turned to see the Magi, in phalanx, where they had been announcing the prizes before. Had they been present for the boys' exchange? Or had they departed unobserved and returned later? "Sorry to interrupt your afternoon, Ikari-san..." "...but we, the Board of Directors, didn't get the chance to talk to you last night..." "...and we were wondering if we could have a little of your time right now." "We could discuss a few irregularities pertaining to this scavenger hunt at the same time." "Not enough to stop it, mind you, but enough to warrant a clarification. On your part." Shinji rose. "I'll come. I'd like a word with the Board myself." "Excellent. They will be meeting with you in Nemuro Memorial. Same as before." Touji whistled. "Dang! Not even elected yet, and I'm already covering for you while you go off and meet with all the movers and shakers." "I appreciate your help, Touji-kun." "Yeah." The young man sighed, smiling in anticipation. "I just wish the food would hurry up and get here. Man, I'm starved." -- Ikari Shinji walked quickly to the north side of Nagamara Dormitory, where Nemuro Memorial Building rose three stories up into the bone- colored sky. The roof looked like pinched clay, short and angular; as if the lower three stories of gray rock had been inside a mold, and the roof was the over-pour. On the west side of the building was a thick wooden door with a wrought-iron handle. Black metal, gray rock and golden wood: the colors of a talisman. Inside, the once-alien hallway yawned before him; Shinji could follow the cenotaph row of chairs extending into the darkness the instant he stepped in the door. Tarrying, he turned to his left to look at the photographs of Feuervogel friends and alumni. Unfamiliar faces, like the ceiling of a hospital, stared back at him: rows and rows of eyes, of mouths, of hands, imprisoned behind plate glass. Stepping further and further down the hallway, he watched old men become young and women regain their beauty, while blacks and whites lost their contrast to an amber haze. Memory. The fondness of a memento, the sweet bond of an unhealed scar. Shinji turned back and retraced his steps to the grated window. Below the bright chandelier was an immaculately clean desk, a filing cabinet and a recent model computer just booting up. A woman was staring fixedly at Shinji. The grating obscured her features; he could see that she had light hair and was dressed in brown, but beyond that nothing. He did not flinch. "My name's Ikari Shinji, and I'm here to attend the Board meeting." "I see." It was the woman from his previous visit, now with a face and figure to go with her voice. "Do you have an appointment?" "I'm afraid not," he admitted. "I was only invited to come just now." Without moving a muscle, the woman announced, "You can't just walk in on a Board meeting without an appointment. It's impossible." Shinji frowned. "I beg your pardon?" "It's simply not done. Nobody, only a select few people, ever go into a Board meeting without an appointment first. Hardly anyone." "But I've attended one before..." "Some people do attend without appointments. Close to a majority, say, fifty percent." Still, the woman had not changed her tone or expression. "Does that mean I can go in?" asked Shinji. "Oh, yes, a lot of people simply show up at the meetings without letting us know in advance. The vast number, in fact. You know, we encourage students and faculty both to attend them. They're free and open to all. Go on, hurry along then." Ikari Shinji prophesied. _You are a woman who has become so belabored with the cares and confusion of this world that you have forgotten good and evil. Tethered to your job, you lose yourself in the rote execution of its motions. You are flailing about, helpless without direction_ But because he loved God, and he was grateful for all things, he smiled. He felt no pity, only sympathy--her condition might very well have been his own. "I appreciate your help, ma'am. Farewell." "You'd best hurry, young man, or they'll start without you." Without fear, Shinji turned and walked into the darkness. But however far he withdrew into the depths of the building, the light streaming from over his shoulders never diminished. He could count every single rivet binding the leather upholstery to the chair, he could follow his own footprints in the carpet's humble dust all the way to the intersection with the sixth hallway. The green light that spelled out "Elevator" did not pierce his eyes, it greeted them. At the end of the hallway was the elevator, the terminal sign and the button to descend. He pressed the button. The elevator doors opened, revealing a cab barely large enough for one person: a chair was placed inside, facing forward. On the far wall, starkly visible in the cab's light, was a single picture: a pressed black rose. Shinji stepped inside the cab and sat, facing the door. It closed behind him automatically. The interior light went out of its own accord. Ikari Shinji burst into flame. The elevator dropped into freefall. Ikari Shinji floated inches above the cab's floor. The elevator jolted to a stop moments later, and the doors of the elevator burst open. Shinji stepped out of the cab into the huge meeting room, with its Tree of Life above and its bubble chamber photograph below. The chandelier over the table was still unlit; light came from the dozens and dozens of candelabras that surrounded the room, flames flickering on an intangible draft. Around the table, half-risen in surprise, were the five human members of the Board of Directors. In some language alien to the young visitor, Kihl Lorenz uttered a violent curse. "What in God's name have you done, boy?" he snarled. "You sent for me, and I have come," he explained modestly. "The first time I came to visit, I remembered being afraid for my physical safety. I'm not afraid anymore. May I sit down please?" A second member of the board spoke, as if to a creature in a salt mine. "Was that you...flying...I saw a moment ago?" Shinji chuckled. "Gentlemen, wiser men than you and I know that when faith is in conflict with science, faith must bend. I know that my Lord is with me, and I am happy. If I was seen to fly, but it is not possible for a person to fly, then you and I must be mistaken. Why you saw what you saw, however, is a separate question." Again he asked, "May I be seated?" There were nods of assent, and he took his place at the head of the table. He continued, "I was told that you wanted to speak to me about the scavenger hunt. To the best of my knowledge, we've met every condition we need to have met." "Yes, it's true," a third member said as he scratched his chin, "that you've submitted the necessary paperwork, consulted the faculty and staff..." "Then shouldn't that be the end of the issue?" "Why do we need a scavenger hunt at all?" said a fourth. "This is a school, Ikari-san, not a daycare facility. Students have come here to study, to be educated. This trivia you're sponsoring today--while it is, ah, permitted--isn't educational by any stretch of the imagination. Just what are you doing by encouraging it, young man?" "I would argue," Shinji came back, "that it is absolutely essential for any education to take place! Education must take place in an environment that fosters learning--you teach cooking in the kitchen, you teach the classics in a library, because the tools to learn are handy. The obliteration of the outside world has only made this issue more crystalline. If any semblance of life as we've known it is to continue on this campus, we must make an environment to learn about life. "What kind of life do you want students to learn to live? A flat, scholarly life? Oh, yes, then they'll be dependent on you for every aspect of their lives, but you gentlemen are wise enough to know that when you die, the students on this campus will be lost. No, this cannot come to pass. We must foster an environment where students not only feel like they are part of a community, but that they can participate in this community freely, and make it over again in their own image. Each one must draw closer to God, must leave this world a better place than when the arrived, of their own free will. That is the kind of campus I seek to promote, gentlemen. A scavenger hunt isn't a whole solution, no, only a dream of one. But is something that I, and my friends, can do and can do right now." The fifth and final member of the board had been looking at Shinji in a most skeptical fashion, and after a perfunctory snort spoke. "You talk about 'making the world in our own image' and 'leaving this world a better place', young fellow. If it weren't for the fact that you seem to be listening to other people's interests, you'd be the spitting image of your own father." Ikari Shinji stiffened. The Board fell uncomfortably silent. Around the room, the flames of the candelabras flickered. "What do you know about my father?" Shinji asked. "Fuyutsuki-sensei was going to talk to me about him, but he died before he could tell me anything." Lorenz spoke. "We all knew your father, Ikari-san. All of us here at the table, as well as many of the faculty members. We knew your mother as well. We were all colleagues together at ROSA. Your father...had an ability to contribute relatively little, yet synthesize terrific amounts of raw data and present it in ways that were easy for people all throughout the organization to understand. He could also glean whatever information was to be found that was relevant to his own interests." The candle flames turned color from yellow to blue. Shinji asked another question. "Did you know, before you came here, what my father was planning to do?" "Yes and no." Lorenz looked old and tired, like an edible fungus, in the darkening room. "We saw his madness, but we didn't dare probe its depths. Because to comprehend is to contemplate. The safest place we knew for us to be was where your friend Fuyutsuki-sensei had hidden your mother's spiritual essence." "Here? At Feuervogel?" "Yes. Despite the risks her presence generated...we felt safer here than anywhere." "You stayed because you knew he would succeed in destroying the universe outside. Whatever it was he was planning. And you wanted to be the ones guiding the future of the world." With a sudden gust of wind, the candles were extinguished. It was a moment before any of the people in the room could adjust to the dim red glow as the sole sources of illumination; and in that moment, the three empty seats in the room were filled. "Can you really be angry..." "...because they had..." "...ulterior motives?" "Of course not." Shinji's voice, meek but not pusillanimous, carried through the room. "I don't know your moment-to-moment actions, gentlemen, to know if you are without guilt. But I'm not angry. There is a part of me that might find my way into your position. I only hope that I could rise to the challenge of leading this school in these times of trouble. I hope that you will. There is a need for wise leaders on this campus." He went on, his voice slightly cracking. "And I'm very glad to have had the chance to speak with you today. I feel like I know you a little better than I did earlier today. The reason I'm running for president...is so that meetings like this one can take place...so that students with ideas and concerns can come to you freely and be heard." Ikari Shinji rose. "If you have nothing more to talk to me about, gentlemen, I'll be going now." "You may go," Lorenz said softly in the darkness. "Go back out the same way you came in." Shinji rose, turned around and entered the elevator. The doors closed upon him and the cab rose in the normal fashion. The ride ended at a corridor only as wide as the elevator itself, terminating at a glass- paned door leading out into the daylight. He walked outside to find himself on the east side of Nemuro Hall. The door clicked shut behind him. It was late afternoon, and beneath a blanket of clouds the cool of the day looked little different from the morning. To Shinji's right, in the south, was Nagamara Dormitory where the other boys were boarded. To his left, in the north, was one end of the northern garden, the forested lands. In front of him, between the Memorial Hall and the school buildings, were a campus lamp, a bench, a bento box and Ibuki Maya. Her socks were no more worse the wear from the day's activities, and the clip still clung to her hair; but her skin was flushed from a day outside. There was a drowsy, droopy smile on her face that broadened into a happy grin as she recognized her friend. "Shinji-kun!" "Maya, this is a pleasant surprise!" He walked over to the bench and sat between her and the light pole. "You haven't been waiting long, have you?" "A little while," she admitted. "Kanae-chan told me this would be the best place to wait for you. So here I am." "I'm glad to see you. How did the scavenger hunt go?" "Flawlessly. We had winners about 45 minutes ago." "Who was it?" "It was Hozumi Mari's team. Do you know Mari-chan, Shinji? She was kind of Tsuwabuki's kohai, always trying to get him to tell her what life was like for a high school student." Maya added, "She hasn't decided what to do with the car, though." Shinji nodded, then stood up again. "I was going to walk back towards Akumafune, Maya-chan. Won't you walk with me?" "I'd love to!" she said, and then handed Shinji the bento. "Here. You missed lunch...uh, you must be hungry, right? I saved you a bento." "Thank you, Maya," Shinji replied. His stomach growled audibly. They both laughed, and began walking eastward side by side. Along the northern edge of Feuervogel Academy was a garden of about three acres. Walking paths ran to and fro through the garden, made out of dull rock the color of concrete. They converged on the pathway that led down from the temple of all faiths. The temple was an octagonal building, about six meters on a side. Ikari Shinji spoke to Ibuki Maya on the steps of the temple, innocent of the mediocrity of a scene without the setting sun. "Maya-chan, please listen to what I say. I love God, in these days more than ever. I love God in the extreme. Yet when I look at you, I see a girl who has been a friend and companion to me in a way that nobody else on the Earth has been, and nobody else will be. I'm grateful for what you are to me, Maya. I want to get to know you better and make a space for you in my heart. So I'm torn, because my God is always going to be my first love, and the best that you will come is second. I don't want to hurt you with this kind of love, Maya. Could you learn to accept me as I am?" "Shinji-kun...I look at you and I see something incredible, something I feel like I could never be. But every time I tell myself that, I feel this little Chibi-Shinji sitting on my shoulder saying, 'Yes you can, Maya, yes you can.' I've never felt that way about anything, Shinji. Not math, not fencing, not anything. I want more, Shinji-kun. For the first time in my life, I want more than I feel like I could ever have. When you say that you love God more than me, I can kind of understand that. If...if you can love God, and yet you can make me feel like I'm not second best, then...well...maybe I could learn to accept you, too." "Thank you, Maya. That's all I need to know." "Shinji-kun, is this love?" "It could be, I think," he said softly. "We'll give it time. We'll try to make it be love." He kissed her, and he thought of the good Earth itself; fertile, bringing forth life without the rites of man. Her lips yielded, caressing his own. The kiss was an affirmation of what was to come. "I will see you," he said at length, "two days from today. At the latest." "I'll be looking forward to it, Shinji-kun. I already am." They walked home together, side by side, hand in hand. He said good- night to her where the walkways diverged, and they separated for the evening. "Ah, there you are!" Nagisa Kaworu burst out as Shinji entered Akumafune Dormitory. "And you have something to eat with you. Eat up, eat up, and then we'll get started." Shinji glanced at Kaworu, confused. "Are we at another fulcrum?" he asked. "Yes," the pale and ruddy boy replied. "Fortunately, we won't be dealing with it until tomorrow. Tonight, we have to get the entire house cleaned. This house is terribly impure, and we simply must get it in order before the morning." The blue-eyed boy sat down on a couch and extracted his chopsticks from the bento. "And where's Rei, may I ask?" "She's spent the whole afternoon cleaning. Specifically, she's been cleaning the downstairs furo." "The whole afternoon to clean the furo? Why is she taking so long?" "Well, Pen-pen won't get out, and that's slowed everything down."