From: hierosolyma@yahoo.com Subject: [Eva/Star Wars][FanFic] First Contact ----------------------------------------------------------- FIRST CONTACT - A Crossover By Hierosolyma Kadathian hierosolyma@yahoo.com ----------------------------------------------------------- Note: This story is set on an alternate future of the Evangelion story and ignores all events from episode 18 on. There are still new angels appearing. The number of angels has been doubled to 34 -- Kaworu being the last. Also, there is a new EVA pilot -- Paolo Capellini -- who has been there for about two weeks now. He is the sixth child (being Touji the fourth and Kaworu the fifth), and pilots unit 04. Touji has suffered his accident and Unit 03 was put out of commission. Further explanation will be provided (I think) during the story. Also, there was a budget cut before the film could be completed, so the end will be less than satisfying. I hope you still enjoy the story, though ^_^ --HK -- PROLOGUE -- "Uhm... Maya?" Aoba asked, intrigued. "What?" Maya craned her head to see. "Take... take a look at this." Aoba pointed. "Aoba... it's..." she stared, agape. "Huge, Maya." "Right. And pointy." They were both staring at an image on Aoba's console. * * * "Major Katsuragi." Misato knew that deadpan voice all too well. She was on her lunch break. Her lunch break! And not even then will Mr. Oversized-Sideburns will leave her in peace. "Yes, Commander Ikari?" "There... seems to be a problem." * * * "Admiral." "Hmhphm," came a voice muffled by the military-stock pillow. Admiral Jen Oteng was definitely not in the mood for an interruption of his beauty sleep. "Whaddaya want?" he finally ranted. "Admiral," said again a cautious Vice-Admiral Zetsen. "Yes, Vice-Admiral," said the other, now raising the captain's chair to a sitting position. "There's... been a problem." "What? A problem? Thank the Emperor. We've been on patrol for thirteen cycles," he replied, cheerfully. But the Vice-Admiral seemed a bit too cautious. Even for him. "Well, Yu? What is it?" "We... are lost, sir." The Admiral blinked. "Lost, Vice-Admiral?" Zetsen nodded, "Lost." The bridge crew looked frightened at this, but minded their own business. "And why," the Admiral inquired, "are we... lost, Vice-Admiral Zetsen?" A nearly skeptical tone at that. Yu and his embellishments, he thought. "Because... our hyperspatial calculations seem to have gone wrong, sir. We encountered a small... bump in the road, might I say... and we have exited hyperspace near an uncharted planet." At that, the Admiral whitened. He started to walk around in circles, nervously. "Have you tried sending a distress signal to Imperial Command?" "Yessir. There was no response. Sir," Yu replied. "Oh my, oh my, oh my," the Admiral mumbled nervously, hands clasped. "Sir?" Yu inquired. "Yes, Yu." "What should we tell Lord Vader?" * * * BESTE GEHIRNE presents a HIEROSOLYMA KADATHIAN fanfic film produced by HIEROSOLYMA KADATHIAN directed by HIEROSOLYMA KADATHIAN written by HIEROSOLYMA KADATHIAN IKARI SHINJI SOURYU ASUKA LANGLEY AYANAMI REI ---------------------------------------- -- FIRST CONTACT -- -- A crossover -- ---------------------------------------- KATSURAGI MISATO IKARI GENDOU FUYUUTSUKI KOUZOU WITH Charles Bronson as JEN OTENG AND Ralph Fiennes as YU ZETSEN INTRODUCING PAOLO CAPELLINI casting by HIEROSOLYMA KADATHIAN, C. S. A. * * * It was a cold, quiet, evening. Why can't things be quiet, Misato thought to herself. Another day, another angel. They've numbered to 29 already. And this one's just hanging around there. And it seems to break up into pieces. She still looked at the satellite pictures, puzzled. What was that thing? It was triangular, metal based. But elongated. Not very descriptive, but that's how sleepy she was. Even after the fifth cup of coffee. She got up from the kitchen table, and walked slowly across the apartment. And, at that, she caught a glimpse, through an open door, of Shinji asleep. He was so quiet, wasn't he? Always trapped in his own little world. And Paolo. Paolo lay on a matress next to Shinji's bed. He slept giving the impression that one little shout would wake him, and he'd be ready for action. Of the four Children, he seemed to be the most confident. The only thing that made her want to stop doing this was that it made her feel old. But, it was good to watch the children sleep. And remind herself that at least someone had more sense than drinking a liter of coffee. Unlike herself. But, this wasn't going to make the night any shorter. Time to go to bed. Get some sleep. * * * "Ayanami." "Yes." The Professor was calling the students at the beginning of his class. The last period of the day, too. "So, Caperini," asked Touji to the boy next to him, "You come from Italy, right?" "Yes, I do," replied the boy, replying next to the teacher, who had just called his name. He was fourteen, going on fifteen. He was tall and slender, with an olive complexion to his skin, and dark brown hair in a crew cut. His green eyes gleamed at the mention of home. "From Milan," he proceeded. "That's nice..." Asuka piped in from behind, "Maybe you should've stayed there." "Do I threaten you, Asuka?" the other turned, eyeing her and smirking. "Or, does this have anything to do with your failure in training last--" "Shut up, pizza-boy!" Asuka bellowed instinctively. And, at that, got the attention of the entire class, who were paying more attention to them than to the teacher -- who was oblivious to everything. "Come on, you two!" Hikari stood up. Asuka had a look of foul weather over her face, Paolo was still smirking, apparently satisfied with the results of his piercing. "Stop it, now, and pay attention to class! Please!" Asuka became silent again, to her friend's behest. Paolo nodded to Hikari, "That was my intention." * * * "So, Ritsuko, what's this with the EVAs flying?" Kaji questioned her loudly at the NERV mess hall. "Sh-h-h!" Ritsuko eyed him sternly. "That's a code-black secret project. You're not even supposed to know about it." "I have my ways," he grinned, "and, to me, a secret is just a truth a little harder to get to." "Military secrets are secret for a reason," she refuted. "I don't care," he shrugged, "But, anyway, they say you're going to equip the EVAs with antigrav units so they can fly." "I said I'm not supposed to talk about it. Now hush," Ritsuko ordered. "Try me," Kaji walked out the door. * * * "Ikari," Kensuke leaned over, during that same period. "Yes?" Shinji looked at him patiently. "Is it me, or has your new friend Caperini been awfully friendly to Ayanami?" He let out a wry grin. "I don't know. He's friendly like that to everybody," Shinji replied, quietly, "That's just how he is. Asuka says he's hiding something." "But it's all the time," piped in Touji, turning his head to face Shinji, "'Good morning, Rei! May I call you Rei? How are you doing, Rei?'" He did a reasonable imitation of Paolo's japanese, with the sing-song nature of the Italian accent. Kensuke chuckled cheerfully, Shinji let out a soft smile, replying "I guess so. But I wouldn't bet on him. I've never seen Rei fall for anybody." "Ah... I don't know. I bet you two have something we don't know, eh, Ikari?" teased Touji, "All those training sessions together..." "No!" denied Shinji, wide-eyed, "We don't! Really!" "He's kidding you, Ikari," Kensuke grinned. "We don't really think you have something with Ayanami. Well. Not anymore," and at that he and Touji laughed, getting a stern snap from -- guess -- Hikari. "Be quiet! Now!" * * * Inhale, exhale. Inhale, exhale. The mechanized breathing of Darth Vader, Dark Lord of the Sith, could be heard two rooms away from his private quarters in the Victory Star Destroyer Impassive. "Yes, Admiral?" said the deep, frigid voice as Jen Oteng walked in. "Milord," the Admiral walked in, and stopped, head low, "There has been... a problem." "The rebels, Admiral?" The armour-clad figure now got up from a chair, facing him. "What is so important that you have to interrupt me." "Not the rebels, milord," Jen shook his head. "It appears... there's been a malfunction in the hyperdrive. We don't know exactly where we are... but..." He paused, trembling. Lord Vader only stared at him, awaiting for him to proceed. "It would appear that we are in another galaxy, milord. We've come to orbit of a planet that appears to be civilized. The only one in its system," Oteng continued to stare at the ground. "I see," Vader said, calmly. One would not notice, but underneath his mask, he was smiling. "I have already made the arrangements, milord. And have prepared Vice- Admiral Zetsen to take over command after my passing," Oteng raised his head, at this, facing the Dark Lord directly. This was his last few minutes of life, he thought. Ulsa would have to find another career-military husband. "Your... passing, Admiral? Do you refer to my reputation to kill every officer that makes a mistake?" Vader questioned, almost amused. "Yes. I do," no time to waste with formalities, Jen thought. He was going to die, anyway. "And, was this a mistake, Admiral?" "No, milord. It was a malfunction," Jen realized. "Then it is not a mistake. And thus, you have nothing to worry about," Vader concluded. "Do you agree, Admiral?" "Yes, milord," Jen smiled relieved, bringing a hand to his throat and rubbing it, "Thank you for clarifying that for me." "Enough with the pleasantries. Now, have you tried to contact Imperial Command?" * * * "Major," Maya called out from her seat at the console. "Yes, Maya?" Misato looked up from her duties. "There seems to be a problem with this Angel," she stated. Aoba and Hyuuga looked at Misato, as if indicating they, too, had noticed it. "What is it?" "See... there is no blue pattern in our scanners," replied Maya. "What...?" Misato got up, "Scan that thing." "Yes, ma'am," they did as told, "It is composed primarily of some kind of metal... though it is unknown to us which. Atomic number 245." "It's a piece of machinery," continued Aoba, "I can see a nuclear fusion generator." "I'm detecting about six thousand lifeforms aboard, Major," Hyuuga completed. "...what..." Misato was dumbfounded. "You mean that's a ship of some sort?" "Precisely, ma'am," replied Maya. "The Commander is going to love this." * * * "A WHAT?" "You heard me, Fuyuutsuki," Gendou stared from his desk. Fuyuutsuki stood before Commander Ikari's desk, a worried look on his face. "The Americans will want to interfere." "They already have," the Commander replied, "They're threatening to send a diplomat to talk to them." "But they mustn't." "They won't." Gendou, as always, was confident. * * * Maya heard a beeping from her console. The computer had finished its task. "Major Katsuragi? The aliens have sent us their language and alphabet, and a hailing message. We have translated it," she announced. Misato disappeared from the room for a moment. She returned accompanied by Gendo, Fuyuutsuki, and Ritsuko. "Put it through," Gendo ordered. "Yes, sir." The deadpan voice of the synth translator began. "'We are the Victory Star Destroyer Impassive of the Galactic Empire. You will surrender, or be destroyed. If you resist, you will meet deadly force. If you cooperate, we will grant you citizenship to our great Empire.'" Expressions in the room varied from worried to absolutely terrified. "I... will be back shortly. Do not reply to that," Gendo ordered, and left. * * * "Misato-san?" Shinji said, over the dinner table. "Yes, Shinji?" she replied. "What of the angel?" he asked. Asuka and Paolo remained quiet, for they were curious as well. "Oh," Misato attempted at a warm smile, "It was just a false alarm. Really. Two days from now you have training. Be ready." * * * The SEELE members -- or at least the plaques representing them -- were gathered in the usual circle, Gendo in the middle. "You say they want to invade, Commander Ikari?" Number 02 inquired. "Only if we refuse to join their Empire," Gendo replied, "Which I'm guessing is very authoritative." "Obviously," said Number 03, "and it must be vast, by what they're saying. Galactic Empire, they claim." "The Americans will want to interfere," Gendo said, "They always do. And that they'll use as an excuse to get a foot on Japan." "They won't. We assure you. But take care of this. Otherwise, we will," said Number 01, "but it won't be as discrete." * * * "Rei?" Paolo approached the blue-haired girl before she could leave the class. "Yes," she replied, immediately. "I have noticed lately that our Eva Units haven't been acting well in cohesion as it should. I have elaborated some tactics I'd like to discuss with you this afternoon, if it wouldn't be a bother," he looked at her with a soft smile. Most of the students were gone by now. "I think we should discuss this with Commander Ikari," she replied, without changing the tone of voice. "Not everything has to go through Commander Ikari," the other retorted, "He'll be glad we took the initiative without bothering him about it." That seemed to click something in Rei, and thus she agreed. "May I go with you to your apartment?" "Yes." * * * "Hey, Dummkopf!" Shinji winced at the all-too-familiar voice shouting at him from the kitchen. "Yes, Asuka?" "Where's Pizza-boy?" she inquired, grinning sadistically. "He went to Rei's. Said something about Eva tactics," he replied attentively, then turned back to the TV set. "Tactics?! Why didn't you ask him more about it?" she demanded, angrily. "I don't know! I'm sorry," he pleaded. "That jerk! Idiotische Schwueler!" She stormed out of the room. * * * "Any response from the planet yet, Admiral?" Vader demanded. "No, milord," Jen shook his head. "Are you sure you contacted the head of their government?" "Apparently, sir. That seems to be the most heavily-guarded area there." "Aah," he groaned, "give it another day. Keep resending it every two hours." "As you wish, milord." * * * "So, if I stood a few meters behind your unit everytime you attack, maintaining an angle of attack of ten degrees..." Paolo and Rei sat opposite to each other on her apartment's floor. He moved around two pieces on a hexagonical map. A white piece from a boardgame represented Unit 00, a green piece represented Unit 04. He continued to explain the tactic he had forged as an excuse for this meeting. "And, that way we can do a pierce attack on the Angel," he moved the pieces accordingly, "unless it tried to escape on that direction." The piece representing the Angel now moved closer to Rei. "We would have to follow it," she said. "Right. We could always do another pierce attack," he moved both Units sideways, and then forward, leaning over to do that. And that was what he was waiting for. "Then, our Units start in this direction again," he left the pieces were they were and moved his hands to her waist, moving his face closer and closer to hers, "and meet." At that, she was kissed by him. To which she demonstrated no reaction until he retracted. "Is this supposed to help in our training?" she asked, without a change in voice, except a barely noticeable tone of annoyance. "Training, training!" Paolo stood, arms flailing. "Is that all you care about?" "Yes," she answered, flatly. "Have you no desires of your own?" "Yes." "And which are those?" "To do as Commander Ikari wishes." "Aagh!" he sat again. "I can't believe this. You mean what I just did meant nothing to you?" "Yes." "Yes, what?" "Yes, it meant nothing to me." "No." He leaned over again, bringing his hands to her face, and kissed again, more passionately this time. But she still did not react. "Nothing?" he asked. "Nothing." "Of course you feel something. You're just holding it back," and at that, he started to gather his things. To that Rei didn't respond. It wouldn't be worth the trouble. * * * Commander Ikari entered the command room of NERV, accompanied by Misato. "Is it possible for us to send a message in their language?" he inquired. "I think so, Commander," replied Maya from her console. "The computer finished refining its interpretation of their alphabet and language system, sir. It's very basic," Hyuuga added, "Actually, it's called Imperial Basic." "Good. You will send a message, then." * * * "Asuka, shouldn't you wait until Paolo comes home before you jump into conclusions?" Shinji asked, reluctantly. "Shut up, Dummkopf!" she ordered. "I'm not jumping to conclusions. This is too obvious." "What is?" "He wants to use Rei to get more kills than me! How idiotic are you?" "I'm sorry." The door opens. Paolo comes in, a raging look on his face. "Aha! If it isn't pizza-boy! So! It seems like you're thinking of tricking me and making yourself look better! Why, I'm not letting that happen! I--" He ignored her, and proceeded to his room. "Don't turn your back on me when I'm talking!" she screeched. "I don't want to talk about it," he mumbled. And shut the door to his room. "This is your fault!" Asuka bellowed at Shinji. And then stormed out to her room. Pen-Pen walked out of the kitchen, obviously annoyed by the noise. "She always does that to me," remarked Shinji, to which he got a "Wark!" And the penguin turned back to the kitchen. * * * "Admiral..." Zetsen called. "Yes, Yu?" he replied. "We have a response from the planet." "Excellent," he smiled, relieved. "Decode it." "We don't have to," he replied. "Wha--? You mean they decoded our signals?!" "It would appear as such, sir," Zetsen concluded. "Notify Lord Vader." * * * "Doctor?" Gendo called Ritsuko in one of the NERV laboratories. "Yes, Commander?" she stared at the other longingly, despite the formalities they masked themselves in. "How is Project Condor going about?" "We still need to test. But, in theory, the EVAs will be able to fly with these things," she walked around one of the giant turbines being built, "We can start testing immediately. "Why, is this related to the ship outside?" Actually, Kaji had filled her in on a lot of what was going on, including the message the Empire had sent, but she chose to hide that for now. "There is no time for testing. Install them immediately on the Units," he said. And left the lab before she had time to protest. * * * The face of Commander Ikari appeared on the main viewer of the Impassive's bridge. "Commanders of the..." he looked down at his notes, "Victory Star Destroyer Impassive. I am Commander Gendou Ikari, head of NERV, central of Earth Defense. "Having received your--" a pause for irony, "kind offer, we will have to decline. We will not subdue to threats. If you want our submission, you will have to attain it by force. "That is all," he concluded. And the image stopped at that. All at the bridge stood silent. The only sounds were those of the computers, and Vader's breathing. "Descend to atmospheric level. Launch ground assault forces," he ordered. And left the room. * * * "Hey, Caperini!" Kensuke called out during lunch break. Touji followed him--he was still having trouble with the mechanical leg--and Shinji tagged along timidly. "Yeah?" Paolo looked up, a soft smile on his face. "I hear you went home with Ayanami yesterday, eh? Getting lucky with the blue-haired chick, aren't you?" he teased. "No," Paolo said, and continued to nibble on his sandwich. "Oh, come on," piped in Touji, "Tell us about it! So, does she have blue hair down there, too, eh?" At that they laughed, along with some boys that were starting to eavesdrop. "Nothing happened!" he stood from the bench, a wry grin over his face. "She doesn't know she likes me." All around oooed, sarcastically. "Mr. Irresistible, aren't you?" an anonymous boy commented. "Yeah!" Paolo started to say, "But I'll win her over. You'll see," and he walked off with his lunch. "Ayanami-san! Ayanami-san!" A group of girls gathered around Rei. "Yes?" "Someone said the new guy Caperini-san went to your apartment last night!" asked a short, round-faced girl. "Is it true?" "Yes," she replied, expressionless. Most of the girls screamed in excitement. "Tell us about it!" a few pleaded, "Did he kiss you?!" "Yes," was her reply. Which wasn't far from the truth. But was giving her more attention she desired to get. "Are you going to see him again?" "Evidently," she replied, still deadpan, trying to walk out of the group. Among the girls--ten or so--commentary of all sorts could be heard, covering the subjects of how cute Paolo was, how hard was it to imagine Rei with anybody. Also, some remarks of jealousy, others complimenting Rei. She was saved by the loud klaxons characterizing a NERV red alert. All of them organized in the usual single files to get into the shelters. The four pilots were taken to the NERV central. * * * "Commander! Status report!" a voice over the com unit demanded. "We have landed at five kilometers from the main city, milord. All AT-AT units ready. AT-ST units ready. One Gunboat squadron is circling the city," replied Col. Yon Mikai, head of Ground Operations. Darth Vader looked at the screen. "Excellent. Also, the city seems to have a defense system in itself--it's going underground. What you have to do is destroy the tactical center. It's located underground, on these coordinates you are receiving. Use blasters to cut through the shielding." "Acknowledged, milord." "The Destroyer will provide cover. Dismissed." * * * Misato had picked up the children from school. Paolo was already asking as he got in the car, "The thirtieth angel! It's attacking!" "Wrong," said Misato, leaving all of them baffled. "Not an angel this time." "What?" Asuka, Shinji and Paolo asked in unison disbelief. "What is it, then?" asked Asuka. "Aliens. Trying to invade Earth," Misato's voice was solemn, "and Empire, as they claim." All was quiet for a moment. Rei kept her same poker-faced expression, Asuka looked legitimately frightened, Paolo's face was unchanged, Shinji broke in laughter-- They all glared at him. "Shut up, Dummkopf!" cried out a certain pilot who will go nameless. "It's--I can't--" Shinji was legitimately trying to regain control. "What is wrong with you?" demanded Paolo. Misato just listened, a worried look on her face. Maybe these kids have been working too hard, she thought. "I--" Shinji started to regain his breath. "It's just, so--" But he started to cackle again. "You're nuts! You're nuts!" cried out Paolo. * * * Misato briefed them personally on the mission. The enemy was attacking with ground forces, plus fighters. They were to use the Evangelions to try to detain those forces, with the assistance of their own military forces. They were to kill off most of the forces, and then destroy the mothership itself. "And... how are we supposed to attack a target that's on the ionosphere?" asked Paolo. "That's where Project Condor comes in," she replied, grinning slightly. "Follow me," she said, and walked out of the room. They went to the launch bays where the Evangelions were placed. What they noticed was that each Eva unit had four turbines equipped to its back, disposed in a linear fashion. "And how are we supposed to operate that?" asked a stupefied Shinji. "Mentally," replied Ritsuko, who was nearby, commanding the final adjustments. "Just like that?" asked Asuka. "Just like that," Ritsuko nodded. "I'll take point," offered Paolo. "Next time," declined Misato, "Asuka will take point this time." "No, I should take point," he refuted, thus angering Asuka. "Why should you take point, Pizza-boy?" Asuka demanded. "Because I should," was his reply. All stared in disbelief at their display. Asuka laughed, and started to walk in the direction of the changing room. At which Paolo grabbed her arm firmly with his right hand. "I said," he pulled her back, "I'm taking point." Her reaction was not immediate. Perhaps for the unprecedence of the event. But, after a second and a half or so, her eyes flared. And she screamed, hitting his face with a hard slap. "No, you won't!" Paolo's reply was a violent slap back to her face. "I will!" But by then, Misato and Ritsuko were each getting hold of one of them, two guards helping. "There's no time for this!" Misato yelled, sternly, "Asuka, you and Rei go to the changing room first," she ordered. Asuka, of course, refused. "Not until this bastard gets what he deserves!" she struggled with the four arms holding her back. "We will discuss this very thoroughly when you get back," Misato assured her. "Now go!" At that, Asuka calmed down. "Yes, Misato-san," she replied, and ran off to the changing room. Rei followed. Paolo remained impassive. No one spoke another word. * * * The battle started. The earthly forces, armed with tanks, fighters, missile launchers, were losing, of course. The bullets and missiles were simply not piercing the shields of the mighty AT-ATs and AT-STs the Empire sent out. The fighters weren't getting such a beating from the TIEs, but the Gunboats were still doing their jobs. And thus the Eva units were launched. Each was armed with a particle gun. Shinji was ordered to take point, despite both Paolo's and Asuka's protests. "This is your fault, Pizza-boy!" Asuka screamed on the intercom. Paolo said nothing. Shinji started moving towards the Imperial forces, followed by the other three. They took position and started firing. The occasional fighter was hit, the occasional friendly fighter as well. And thus they were ordered to leave the fighters alone for now, and concentrate on the walkers. Paolo cut Shinji off, and started on his own towards the walkers. "Hey! He's the one supposed to take point, you moron!" protested Asuka, running after him. The walkers came to the height of the Eva's knees, approximately, and thus Paolo had started to fire on the roof of one of them. "What's that tickling on my feet?" asked Shinji. And then he looked down. He was taking laser fire. Asuka decided to stop protesting for the moment and concentrating on the mission. The weapons were working, but were taking too long to perforate one walker, let alone the others. And there was still the fighters to take care of. At that, Shinji took an initiative. He grabbed one of the walkers by the head, but immediately felt a burning sensation on his hands. The shields, no doubt. Trying to ignore the pain, he lifted one of the walkers by the head. And dropped it. It fell on the ground and exploded, taking a few with it. "Wonderful!" cried Gendou on the intercom. "Everybody follow that tactic." Which they did. Rei obeyed immediately. Paolo started to kick through the walkers. Asuka continued to use the gun for a while, but then gave up and resorted to the technique. All of the walkers were destroyed that way. The Units had taken neglectible damage. "Now comes the hard part," said Misato. * * * "Milord," said the Admiral. "Yes, Admiral?" "We have just figured out a way to go back to our galaxy," Jen announced. "What is it?" Vader asked. "Apparently we found a rift in hyperspace -- a "fold" in space -- that took us to this place. All we have to do is to go back, as if we were heading back to Coruscant. We checked our records. It's happened before." "Very well. How are things on ground?" "I'll have to check." * * * The EVAs were swatting the fighters with their hands, picking them out like flies. The TIEs were the easiest of all, having no shields. The Gunboats burned a little. "Enough of that!" ordered Gendou. "Go after the mothership!" They complied. Paolo took point, and, at this point, nobody cared enough to contradict him anymore. Activating the turbines for the first time, they flew over to the triangular vessel. The Evangelions looked small compared with the 900 kilometer-long Victory Star Destroyer. Actually, they looked minuscular. And they were taking fire. Heavy fire from the Star Destroyer's cannons. "All pilots report back to ground," ordered Gendou. And so they did. They returned, and four weapons buildings had a small disc inside. "Each of those is an N2 mine. You are to plant them on that ship and get out before they explode." They flew back to the Star Destroyer. * * * "Milord," Admiral Jen said. "What?" "I think you should see this." "What?" "Each of those robots has a nuclear warhead equipped on it." "Prepare my shuttle for launch." "Yes, milord." * * * "So, we're supposed to plant these where?" Asuka asked. "Anywhere you can," Misato replied. "But.. that tower on top. That seems to be the bridge. Be sure to plant at least two near that." "Yes, ma'am." They headed towards the ship again, and started to get fire. Again. Paolo started, again, to take point. Again. And heading faster than the others, directly to the ship. "PAOLO!" Misato bellowed, "TURN BACK! AT THAT SPEED YOU WON'T BE ABLE TO--" But it was too late. He'd already crashed against the ship. (Cut to scene with stormtroopers at the Hangar Bay tossed around by explosions.) * * * "Rats," said Gendou. Misato was in tears. "I know, Commander," piped in Fuyuutsuki. "That's the second pilot we lose." "No. I'm talking about that good N2 mine we lost without detonating." * * * "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" Asuka yelled and pulled out the progressive knife. "Asuka! We're not about to lose you too!" said Gendou. "Control yourself." Rei was nearer to the ship than anybody. She found a spot free of cannons, and planted the mine there, near the back of the ship. Shinji planted one behind the bridge. Asuka slashed at the cannons with the knife, and then cut through the hull, raging. Time to show off, she thought. She threw in a mine. "All right, get out of there," Gendou ordered. * * * "Admiral." "Yes, Yu?" Admiral Jen said, right after seeing Vader's shuttle off. "There's been a problem." "What is it, Yu?" "The rift's no longer there. Lord Vader crossed it and it disappeared." "Does that mean we're STUCK--" The ship exploded and all died in it. * * * The funeral of Paolo was a solemn one. His family--of 83 members--showed up. There was a cocktail afterwards. The members of the Imperial military who survived were judged and condemned for war crimes. They're currently on forced labor for McDonald's. THE END * * * I hope you people liked my fic!! It's my first and took me one day to write. Oh, yeah: Evangelion is copyright Gainax. Star Wars is copyright George f--king Lucas. No animals were injured in the production of this fic, except my mom's canary, that was pissing me off, so I flushed it down the toilet. Not to mention my pet dog -- may she rest in peace. "If people stopped taking care of other peoples' lives, they'd watch out a lot better for their own." - Lao-Tse